College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
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