Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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