Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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