you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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