I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize
