talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Don't tell me you're on acid again
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
