Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
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