I'm drive I can fine osifer
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Randomize
