I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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