I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize
