It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
