How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
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