I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
