He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
