Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
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