And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Randomize
