So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
