We got so high we made milksteak
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
