Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Randomize
