I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
The producers of Marley and Me owe me about $5 million. That's the dollar amount of embarrassment compensation required for making a 24-year-old male cry publicly on an airplane while sitting in the middle seat between a gorgeous babe and a guy with a do-rag
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
