Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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