Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
what is it with giant penises always finding me
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
