There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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