its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
