i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Randomize
