grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
