He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
