ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
