I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Randomize
