She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
