Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
