You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
My dick has a subreddit
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
