can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
