Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Randomize
