I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
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