After last night, I could never be a politician.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
