listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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