apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
