why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
areolas are like halos for boobs.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Randomize
