Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
Randomize
