She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Randomize
