Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
