Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
Randomize
