Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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