great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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