I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Randomize
