I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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