we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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