no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
