remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
lol hangovers are for mortals.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
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